i am her

A loud clank of metal jolts me awake,

as I open my eyes, I see

clouds open up like Valhalla

and light pours through

Illuminating the lands

the remnants, highlight what’s

left on the battlefield

such chaotic destruction, at rest.

What is left of me after all?

The blood stained tattered armor

spread across the fields

sprinkled all around in the tall grass

the sun highlights the wreckage

yet there is beauty in the decay

of what happened here today

What will I do now that I am stripped naked and left with nothing?

Walking through the wet soil

and firm grass

I am reminded, I have my own two feet,

my hands are weathered and stained but

they are still my hands

I am alive with the breath of life in my lungs

And a beating heart that yearns for wholeness.

the light almost hurts my skin

I have been in the darkest of places

for far too long

How did I get here?

I wander, traveling north.

I am a seeker, a seeker of shelter

I desire protection, yet

I am unsure what from.

These cuts on my body

burn so deeply

blood in my hair and on my hands.

blood soaks my clothing

Or what is left of it.

The pain I have endured is unimaginable,

relentless it seems.

“When will this end?” I plea, to whoever is listening, with burning tears running down my face.

As I continue to walk barefoot,

I glance upwards and see

animated puffy grey clouds.

A black mist appears above me,

It becomes a murder of crows.

Flying In spirals and in unison.

Cawing, growling, shrieking

it is as if they are guiding me.

they seem to have answered my question.

I find peace in trusting them,

I am no longer afraid.

“Guide me to safety,” I pray.

As I walk towards what sounds like running water

I am met with a warm energy

which surrounds my spirit

Is someone here?

I approach a babbling creek,

colorful cobblestones dancing under the water

I immerse myself, I take my time

feeling the stones one by one.

“Please mend my soul,” I manage to mutter.

As I wash my body free of the blood stains

the icy water pouring over me

takes the breath right out of my lungs.

I don’t care, I am alive.

I am alive.

I am alive, to tell the tails of my story.

Feelings of pain and sorrow

near eliminated.

Is this what sovereignty feels like once again?

I see an unknown figure in the distance

I am not afraid

The warmth around me,

it grows stronger.

a breathtaking storm of a goddess

wild copper hair, piercing hazel eyes,

a white, windy flow of a dress.

Otherworldly presence.

radiating light yet, a necessary darkness within.

Total duality in goddess form.

She kneels at the water,

she offers a gentle hand.

And helps with no hesitation.

I nearly collapse into her arms.

she holds me and hums a tune,

as she washes my wounds.

I feel so nurtured and accepted

As I gaze down and see

the river runs red,

with the demons of my past

being washed away,

ever so effortlessly…

I sigh heavily, my vision fuzzy,

only for a moment.

Swiftly snapped back to reality,

as the cold water rushes down my head

for the last time.

I realize I am alone.

I have been alone this whole time.

I am her…

The goddess who’s walked

a thousand miles.

I am her.

The goddess who healed,

healed these wounds

and washed my slate clean.

I am her.

The goddess who radiates light

yet darkness within.

I am her.

The goddess who battled her demons

and conquered.

I am her.

I have been resurrected

slowly becoming aware

the battles I had survived

are nothing but a bloody miracle.

The lessons were well learned.

The war is over.

My body is nearly restored

I feel new, in the same body.

a fresh chapter has been written

in my book of divine life.

The warmth of the sun heats my skin,

and in this moment, epiphany.

I am whole, I am her.

Forevermore.

I am her 10/23/2024